What are you wearing?

This is the most frequently asked question over phone to the girlfriends. But why what are you wearing, why not something else? How come everybody is asking the same question? How do they know when to ask, whom to ask?

There is a Bengali proverb which goes as-

Ducklings need not to learn swimming.

I find this very apt in this context. If you are a female older than 18 then you must have come across this question- What are you wearing now? And guys- you might not even remember how many times you asked this. (For a few more skillful guys they might not even be able to count how many girls they asked it!) What I find interesting here is that nobody had actually ever told these boys about this particular question but somehow all of them figure it out by them self in due time. It’s almost like those ducklings who somehow know exactly how to swim the moment they are born, while humans with a much bigger brain size find it difficult and absolutely nobody is born with the ability to swim on the first time they get into water. Apparently swimming is in their genes and so duckling need not to be taught anymore.

So the question is how is everybody asking the same question? and what blows me away is- why do girls answer this question? Girls see it coming. Yet they let it happen. (Guys, let me tell you something- if you think that you can outsmart the girl with your perfectly timed questions then you are in fool’s paradise. Girls always know what they are saying. Most probably she has deceived you with her simple-minded, talkative girl appearance. Just think- of all those infinite sentences she told to you last night- how many really had any information in them?)

Do you know the story behind YouTube’s success? It’s not the revolutionary idea of hosting a free video uploading site but the advancement of secondary technologies which played the most important part behind its success. The first video was uploaded in YouTube on April 23, 2005. Just after two years in 2007 YouTube consumed as much bandwidth as the entire Internet in 2000! But its triumph was heavily backed by something else that was gradually entering into every household- mobile phone. It was during that period that the camera mobiles were flooding the market (not to mention the simultaneous fall in their prices). Videos in digital format had become readily available. Prior to that it was magnetic tape era and for uploading these videos to internet they were needed to be converted into digital format. Secondly, high-speed internet (broadband) was neither cheap nor easily available before that time. Another important aspect of watching videos online. It is the combination of these factors happening in some other dimension gave birth to another successful website. Alexa ranks YouTube as the fourth most visited website on the Internet, behind Google, Yahoo! and Facebook.

The evolution of this question was also benefited by the same device- mobile phone. I don’t think that the playboys of 50s and 60s used to telegram their girlfriends as wat r u wearing? It doesn’t make any sense. Guys don’t ask this until they are sure of the fact that the girl is wearing something interesting(!). Mobile phone has made this possible. Now the phone is with you in the darkness of your bedroom (occasionally even in bathroom too). Most probably the first time when this question was asked by a boy to a girl was in the land-line era. Even in that time few chicks were lucky enough to have a room for herself and also a phone (land-line) in the room. This might have provided an optimal environment for its genesis. I wonder if anybody ever asked his girl-friend ‘What are u wearing’ at 12 noon when she is in college or at work place? (Even if he had ever asked it then it’s either to locate you in the crowd or may be he is spying on you from a distance .)

Beauty of this question lies in its functionality. When a guy is asking this question for the first time he is not exactly looking forward to the answer. He is more keen on the subtle hints. It’s the way she replys that the main point of interest to the guys. If she gets upset then- boy, slow down. And somehow if she is not mad at you then- congrats! you are now ready to take your relationship to the next level. This question is like the Litmus Paper test for Y-generation romance. Another notable aspect of this is its universal appeal. I have personally confirmed with my friends from different parts of India and all of them agreed that they have either asked it (boys) or been asked (girls). And now I am in Australia, I asked my Aussie friends too. Even they validated this hypothesis. My Asian friends (from China, Taiwan and S. Korea) have also given their stamp of approval.

Now my question is why do girls answer this? I am not sure of this though. (Actually never had enough courage to ask anyone.) Here is my take on it- I think girls do it out of sympathy. Much like pity sex. They might be laughing at us in mind and think ‘Its so easy to make the boys happy! Just act dumb and answer some dumber questions… thats it.’ What is the point of knowing what is she wearing at night? That too over phone? You can’t see it anyway. So chuck it! Grow up guys- stop asking dumb questions and cut the crap. Jump straight to the point. Ask it direct. Be a man!!!

(P.S.- Girls please enlighten the eager souls. Let us know- why do you answer this question?)